Great
Ways to Annoy People at Work
- At lunchtime,
sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer
at passing cars to see if they slow down.
- Page yourself
over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.)
- Insist that
your e-mail address be xena-goddess-of-fire@companyname.com
or elvis-the-king@companyname.com.
- Every time
someone asks you to do something, ask if they
want fries with that.
- Encourage your
colleagues to join you in a little
synchronized chair dancing.
- Put your
garbage can on your desk and label it 'IN.'
- Develop an
unnatural fear of staplers.
- Put decaf in
the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone
has gotten over his or her caffeine
addictions, switch to espresso.
- In the memo
field of all your checks, write "for
sexual favours".
- Reply to
everything someone says with, "That's
what you think."
- Finish all your
sentences with "In accordance with the
prophecy."
- Adjust the tint
on your monitor so that the brightness level
lights up the entire working area. Insist to
others that you like it that way.
- Don't use any
punctuation
- As often as
possible, skip rather than walk.
- Ask people what
sex they are.
- Specify that
your drive through order is "to go."
- Find out where
your boss shops and buy exactly the same
outfits. Wear them one day after your boss
does. (This is especially effective if your
boss is the opposite gender.)
- Send e-mail to
the rest of the company to tell them what
you're doing. For example: "If anyone
needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."
- Put mosquito
netting around your cubicle.
- Five days in
advance tell your co-workers you can't attend
the social event because you're not in the
mood.
- Pretend your
phone is a CB when talking with clients.
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